4.29 SOTD

We did it. It’s SATURDAY!!! Hope everyone’s week was great, and here’s to an amazing last weekend of April. Here’s today’s song of the day.

dead

Sleeping With Sirens’ “Better Off Dead” describes exactly how I’ve been feeling lately. It starts with Kellin singing about a girl saying she “wants to end it all when she’s all alone in her room.” I’ve thought about it so often in the dead of the night and even throughout the day if I’m just in my room.

The entire song talks about how nobody listened. Nobody heard her when she said “maybe I’m better off dead.” And sometimes, people take it as a joke when you’re serious or take your behavior as off-putting and scorn you for thinking so “selfishly.”

There are certain cues people should look out for, that should be red flags. Whenever I’m super down, I’m apathetic, I barely eat, and I have massive trouble sleeping. And of course when you’re apathetic, you can’t get anything done and that makes you feel worse because you haven’t done a thing. I don’t do that out of laziness, but because I don’t have the energy to care.

The way she feels inside is too much for her
When all you got is these four walls
It’s not that hard to feel so small
Or even exist at all

I relate to that part of the first verse so much, and it sucks, especially when you feel like you have nobody. But it’s the part of the chorus that says “this is not where I belong” that really gets me. Because I DON’T feel like I belong most of the time.

And the thing is, you can’t save everybody.

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